Yesterday morning, I was still lying in bed when Lydia walked into the room. (Stephen gets her out of her crib every morning and feeds her breakfast, and I love him all the more for it.) She walked over to me with a cracker in one hand and a bottle of craft-paint in the other (Uhh...woops. Probably should figure out where she found that..), handed me the paint, and then walked out.

And that's when the evidence became unmistakably clear: THIS BABY IS WALKING.

Stephen's been ready to claim that she's "walking" for about a week, but I was holding off until she was consistently choosing walking over crawling, and sometime within the last couple of days, the shift was made.

I'll admit that I thought this day would come a while ago (closer to when she turned 1), and I've been a little impatient for it, but now that it's here I am worried that I can't claim Lydia is a baby for much longer, which, of course, makes me a little sad. (Motherhood is weird.)

Thankfully, when I asked, "Lydia, now that you're walking, does that mean you're no longer a baby?!" she immediately replied with, "No, no, no."

I'm gonna go ahead and take that as permission to hold on to her babyhood a little bit longer.

^^I realize this song might be used in every youtube video ever, BUT, I still like it AND it's titled "Spring in my Step" so OBVIOUSLY it was the clear choice for background music despite the fact that it is painfully overused. ☺️

We're trying a new budgeting tactic this year (not a strong point for us🙈) and so far it's been the most effective one yet! (Granted, it's still January. Ha.) Not only has it made me acutely aware of how much money I spend every week, it has also motivated me to sift through and start using the bag full of giftcards that we've been hoarding for years. 😜 

Thankfully, this morning, when Kneaders' all-you-can-eat french toast was calling my name, I didn't even have to hesitate! HOORAY FOR GIFTCARDS!

Sidenote: Kneader's french toast + caramel syrup = pure heaven in pure sugar form

Lydia's at an age where it's getting harder and harder to keep her contained when we go places😳. I think after about 4 or 5 bites of french toast she was waving her hands around like mad to indicate that she was "all done" (see photo).  Not quite done with the french toast, however, just with the highchair she was strapped into. We let her out and she wandered over to the door and started looking outside. At first I thought she was really fascinated with some birds that were walking around on the sidewalk, but then I realized that it was her own reflection that was so captivating. haha! I should have known! This girl looooves to look at herself these days. 

It was the perfect Saturday morning outing despite the conversation that happened as I was typing up this blogpost. 

Me: "I think I ate too much."

Stephen: "Word. I feel ya."

Plus, the fact that it didn't come out of our bank account just made it extra sweet. 👌🏼

_ _ _

han.

3.) I am afraid of cats.

Last week did not get off to a great start. Our church time switched from 1:00 pm to 9:00 am and (while I much prefer the 9:00 am time) it really threw Lydia's napping schedule for a loop! 24 hours later the poor girl still hadn't recovered!

By mid-afternoon on Monday (after a second failed nap-attempt) we were both in a bad place😬. I pulled my phone out as a last resort (homegirl LOVES watching videos of herself) and I had the idea to open Snapchat. Snapchat has what are called "face filters" that turn you into a dog (or other people/animals), and ever since our Christmas in Iowa, Lydia has been particularly obsessed with dogs.

It didn't take long after opening the app that she saw herself on the screen and calmed down quite a bit (haha!). We started with the dog filter because she recently discovered that if she opens her mouth a dog tongue comes out, and that was enough to get a smile out of her.

The next one (which gave her a crown and white face) she found particularly funny and started giggling. I continued switching the filters and she seemed to think each one was even better than the last. Eventually I got to one that distorted her face and nose and she LOST IT. She was laughing SO hard! Hearing her laugh so hard (and then rewatching the video with the voice changer) was hysterical. The video really doesn't capture how hard we were laughing and since it only films 10 seconds at a time, it didn't get the part where we were nearly in tears from laughing so hard!

(The first picture says, "When you're trying to logically explain to your one year old that this is exactly the reason she should be napping.") 

I've tried using the filters (particularly the one with the smooshed face) again this week and I think it creeps her out now! haha! (She still likes lots of the other ones though.) I think sleep deprivation may have played a role in how funny we both thought it was that first time...

I'm happy to report that that moment was a HUGE turning point for us, and even though Lydia only got in one twenty-minute nap that day, we made it a great day anyway. 

_ _ _

han.

It was sometime after 2:00 am, Wednesday, that Lydia woke up screaming for probably the fourth time.

Stephen immediately got up to help calm her, and I suggested he bring her into our bed to see if maybe that would help her sleep for more than a few hours. All told, I had very little confidence this would actually work, but it seemed like a better (and much more lazy) alternative than one of us getting out of bed every few hours to comfort her. 

Stephen brought in our clearly uncomfortable, grumpy, horribly exhausted, teething child. We tried a few things to help her calm down, but nothing seemed to be helping. An attempt to give her some Tylenol was completely unsuccessful, she all but threw the syringe back in my face with an indignant scream.   

I suggested Stephen give her a priesthood blessing and he did so without hesitating. After the blessing we both thought we should give her a bath. We stripped her down and immediately the screaming subsided (the poor girl was burning up with a fever). A few seconds in the water, however, was all it took for her to clearly communicate that a bath was not the answer.

As Stephen carried a dripping, diaper-clad Lydia back over to our bed, she laid her head down on his shoulder and immediately closed her eyes. He carefully got in the bed, propped himself up with some pillows, and held our helpless, hurting little baby, gently patting her back as they both drifted back to sleep.

Watching this from just a few feet away, my breath caught in my throat. Seeing my Stephen, my best friend, my confidant, the love of my life, holding and comforting our almost-naked, perfect little Lydia on his chest, was almost too much for me to handle. I watched them for a few minutes and felt a familiar warmth near my heart I had never experienced before I became a mom, but now experience frequently.

I knew it was much too dark in the room to be able to capture this perfect little scene on camera, so I tried to take in every part of it for as long as I could before I drifted off to sleep.

_ _ _ 

han.

I've never been much of a goal-setter, but I've been a bit addicted to THIS podcast lately, and if it's taught me anything, it's that most successful women are successful on purpose. They don't just think about goals, they actually write them down and hold themselves accountable. 

This probably shouldn't have been as big of an epiphany as it was, seeing as my mom and many of my other young women's leaders tried for years to help me grasp that concept...😬 , but, better late than never, right?!😅

I know this year is going to be a year of transition (hello, baby#2 that will be here before I know it! 😳) and a lot of my goals will become significantly harder once another baby joins our family, but I'm optimistic that if I get good habits in place before he gets here, I'll be exponentially more likely to keep them up after he comes! That being said, I'll also be willing to give myself some slack because #newborns 😂. 

Aaannnyway, I'm actually really excited about my goals, and I've already felt more productive (from making little changes here and there) in the last few weeks than I have in a long time! I really hope this goal setting-fire continues! ☺️

2017 GOALS

Meal plan weekly.

Attend the temple at least once a month.

Not check social media until after I've done something spiritual (i.e. read scriptures or a conference talk)

Have people over for dinner (or dessert/games/fhe) at least once a month.

Establish and maintain a morning and evening routine. (I'll post more about this soon, because I actually started this in early December and it has been GAME CHANGING.)

Be more conscious of the TYPES and AMOUNTS of foods I am eating (even while pregnant 😜) 

Post on instagram at least 5x/week and blog at least once a week. (Have you noticed? 😂)


JANUARY GOALS

Get all of the paperwork turned in and fees paid to make my photography business official

Aim for 24 grams of sugar or less during weekdays, and only have a "half-treat" on weekends

Go over the calendar for the year with Stephen

Finish hanging photos in the living room and kitchen

Finish watching the videos on our online FBA course

PS If you aren't already following thealisonshow , do yourself a favor and do it now! She is hilarious. She is inspirational. She is real. Not to mention we danced together at one of her dance parties, so we're basically best friends 👯. She also started a podcast this week which I am THRILLED about called Awesome with Alison. GO go go! (But just a disclaimer, the theme song WILL get stuck in your head for hours 😂.)

Clapping for herself // taking a few independent steps at a time, or walking with assistance // scrunching up her nose up when she smiles // saying, "woah," "daddy," "doggy," "mommy," "tickle tickle" "oh" "yyyyaaaaa!" "no!" and "hi" (though what she means when she says them is often debatable) // waving // blowing kisses // taking off her socks // throwing food on the ground from her high chair // watching babies and kids with extreme fascination // "monkey crawling" // making the fish face // giggling // tickling and being tickled // putting on and taking off lids (she loves lids) // trying to eat uncooked pasta // devouring frozen mangoes, strawberry flavored oatmeal, life cereal, and scrambled eggs // trying to use her own spoon and fork // pounding on doors, and begging to go out into the hall // roaring like a lion // crawling towards the stairs // opening drawers and emptying their contents on to the floor // trying to stand up in high chairs, shopping carts, and strollers // pressing buttons (literally and figuratively 😜), pulling the kitchen hand-towel on to the floor (😑 ) // unrolling the toilet paper from the roll // doing the "fake out" where she pretends to hand you something and then takes it back // drawing (often with her left hand ☺️) // carrying Kiki around // trying to drink out of 'adult' cups // pointing to where she wants to go // DANCING (if something even resembles music, like the game 'catch phrase' you better believe this girl will be dancing her heart out) // stuffing as many banana puffs or cheerios in her mouth as she possibly can // winning people over left and right

I'm not sure how tall she is, but she continues to be on the petite side as she weighs somewhere between 17.5 - 18 pounds, and wears clothes that range from 6 months to 18 months! haha.

She also has 9 teeth that are fully-in and two additional top molars that are mostly in.

We sure love our little Lydia Lynn! 

_ _ _

han. 

Lydia is currently in her crib, crying. I'm hoping she will fall asleep soon because this is normally when she takes her morning nap, but for some reason this morning she is protesting. I'm hoping to make this a short, quick post, but if I'm being totally honest, that is usually my objective with every post and...well, it almost never happens. ha.

Five years ago TODAY, I unpacked a suitcase full of my belongings (clothes) into a cute little room nestled in the gorgeous BYU Jerusalem Center, overlooking the Mount of Olives, the Kidron Valley, and The Holy City. 

Last night, I had dinner with some friends from that study abroad group, and when someone said it had been 5 years since we were there I honestly couldn't believe it. FIVE YEARS! It's true, as the group pointed out, that since returning home from the study abroad I got married and have one and a half babies, but I just couldn't get over the shock that it has been FIVE. YEARS. 

In an effort to find a nice, sentimental photo I could post on Instagram to represent my time in The Holy Land (HA! Yes, I know how silly that sounds) I started down the rabbit hole of old photos and blogposts from my time there. It only took a few minutes of searching though old posts before I became frustrated with myself for not blogging more while there! I lived and explored Jerusalem (and Jordan and Turkey) for FOUR months, and all I have are 16 measly blogposts to show for it. Pathetic. I'm embarrassed to admit that I can't even remember where over half of the photos I have saved were taken.

(Lydia's whine-crying has turned into scream-crying. I better go do some damage control.)

I started my first blog almost seven years ago (!) and whenever I go back through old posts, it's entirely too easy to pick them apart. My sentences were so choppy. What was I thinking making that picture so small?! My mind is filled with things I wish I'd done differently. I wish so badly I'd blogged more while in Jerusalem, or at least labeled more of my photos! I wish I'd gotten into photography BEFORE I went to Jerusalem because if I knew back then what I know now, I would have SO MANY great photos! After a few minutes of being annoyed with myself and counting all of the things I wished I could go back and redo, I started reading a few of the posts. Memories I'd long since forgotten came flooding back. The HUNDREDS of caterpillars on the "plains" of Judea, the letter I wrote to Kythan Millehan,  listening to I Will Survive while I ran a 10k through the streets of Jerusalem. So many forgotten tidbits made me laugh out loud as I remembered them in vivid detail. 

Maybe it's the pregnancy hormones or maybe it's the fact that Lydia FINALLY fell asleep and is already awake again (20 minutes naps ARE NOT MY JAM), but reading the first post I wrote after landing in Jerusalem (choppy sentences at all) made me tear up as I reminisced about my time there, the incredible experiences I had, and relationships I made. 

I just still can't believe it was five years ago. 

_ _ _

han.

[HANNAH] ATTENDING A DANCE PARTY PUT ON BY ALISON OF THE ALISON SHOW. This was one of those things that I'd been REALLY wanting to do for months (years?), and I finally did it! Now that it's checked off the list, however, I'll probably never do it again. haha. It's funny how after spending $25 on a ticket to get into an all-women dance party, I remembered something: I don't actually like to dance, hahahaha. I mean, I'm ALLL about the IDPs, but dance parties just really aren't my thing. Although this was kind of an unfortunate time to re-remember this trait about myself, I'm still glad I went to see what it was like AND meet/dance with THE ALISON (the sodalicious and rockwell ice cream didn't hurt either 😏). Thankfully, when Alison's next dance party came around (and the tickets doubled in price) I didn't have to feel sad that I wasn't a part of it! (Photo credit: Becky Kimball, taken from this post!)

STEPHEN GRADUATING FROM BYU [WITH A JOB OFFER]. Stephen and I will be forever grateful for the education we each received at BYU, and its role in bringing us together as ity-bity freshman (#RIPoldheritagehalls). We felt very blessed that Stephen was able to land a job offer in Salt Lake (that we were both really excited about) months before he graduated, and we will forever laugh about the fact that the last final he took as an undergraduate student was for BIO100 in which he was required to dress up as a hobbit.  

MEETING ADDITIONAL FAMILY. Due to the tenderness of this subject, I haven't posted about it on social media, but through a series of somewhat miraculous events, Stephen was able to get in contact with (and meet!) his biological parents and their extended families. It has been an incredible experience for us to get to know so many wonderful people, and the sweet and love-filled meeting of his mom and birth-mom is a moment none of us will ever forget.

MOVING FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE WE GOT MARRIED. Moving out of Provo (and out of our first apartment) was definitely bittersweet. We loved living in Provo, but moving away did make us feel a little more like we were entering the "real world." My Aunt and Uncle were SO kind to host us for a few months before we found an apartment that we were really excited about in Bountiful. 

VISITING FAMILY IN CALIFORNIA AND TEXAS. During a "month of homelessness" (before Stephen had to start working) we had a ton of fun visiting my parents in Northern California, my sister Rebekah and her family in Dallas, and my brother Joseph and his family in Houston. We have now visited the stomping grounds of each of my siblings! (Except Miriam who is currently on a mission in New Jersey.)

FINDING OUT A BABY BOY WILL BE JOINING OUR FAMILY IN MAY! Stephen and I have always talked about having our kids close together in age, but after having such a rough pregnancy with Lydia, I wasn't sure I could put my body through that again (at least not any time soon!). Amazingly enough, when Lydia was just a few months old I was already talking about getting her a little sibling! We were thrilled to find out that she will be getting a little brother right around the time she turns one and a half, and I am ecstatic about the fact that this pregnancy has truly been A BREEZE compared to Lydia's (let's just pray the rest of them are this way)!

FURNISHING OUR FIRST 'REAL' APARTMENT AND PURCHASING A WASHER AND DRYER. When we lived in Provo we lived in the basement of a house my parents own. We paid rent to them and had some managerial responsibilities, but moving into an apartment at the beginning of September with no family ties felt much more 'real.'  In November, we did what we agree was the single-most-adult-like-act we've ever experienced, and purchased a washer and dryer of our very own! haha! (Yes, having a baby comes second.) The process of furnishing our apartment is far from over, and I've grown a certain fondness for our cardboard box nightstands, so I don't foresee them going anywhere any time soon. 😂

STEPHEN TAKING THE GMAT. After countless hours of studying for the GMAT, Stephen finally took it in early November! He did AMAZINGLY WELL, and I have to brag about the fact that he scored in the 98th percentile for the verbal section. THAT MEANS that he did better than 98% of people on that half of the test!!!! He doesn't plan to attend grad school (to get an MBA) for a few years, but we wanted to get the test over with (since the score will keep for 5 years) and BOY am I glad it's over with!!!

LYDIA'S FIRST BIRTHDAY. It's pretty crazy that at the beginning of 2016 Lydia couldn't even hold her head up, and "tummy time" was enough to make her scream bloody murder. During the course of this year we have loved watching Lydia learn how to sit up, crawl, laugh, wave, growl, stand, clap, scoot, blow kisses, and take her first steps! The amount that babies learn and grow in a single year is honestly unbelievable. 

SPENDING CHRISTMAS IN IOWA. We loved being able to travel to Iowa again this year for Christmas! It was so great to have people around who are as obsessed with Lydia as we are, and didn't mind following after her as she wandered around the house (always heading for the stairs). Mom Olson was even kind enough to make a new pair of one-year-old-sized Lydia pajamas that match the ones Stephen and I have from last year! (I'll have to post a photo of them soon, they're adorable.)

2016 was an amazing year for our family! We are so excited to see what 2017 has in store!

_ _ _

han.