Yesterday was a long day, only made exponentially longer by my decision to not leave the house all day. (Always a poor choice, but it was cold INSIDE my apartment, so I can only imagine how much colder it was outside. #wimp ← I blame my CA upbringing😜.)
By the time Stephen left for basketball at 9:00 pm, I was READY for some time to relax and get caught up on a few projects (and over-story, as is my typical Tuesday night custom 😜) and juuuust as I was getting in the groove, Elliott woke up. I checked his diaper, fed him, burped him, and put him down again, sure he would fall back asleep without a problem. Wrong. I decided to let him ‘work it out’ and try to fall asleep on his own, but after a solid hour of him “crying” (I put crying in quotes, because he doesn’t really cry, it’s more like a whine haha, he’s a saint) I had had ENOUGH. Annoyed that I hadn't been nearly as productive as I had planned, I went into his room (aka our closet😂) and was determined to get this stinkin’ baby to SLEEP, dangit! Needless to say, I was a liiiittle bit grumpy😬, but Elliott didn’t notice. The second I walked into the room he stopped crying and the moment I picked him up he gave me THE BIGGEST smile followed by he cutest, happiest, jolliest giggle, AND I MELTED INTO A PUDDLE ON THE FLOOR. In an instant he had taken me from grumpy to grateful, madly in love with this suddenly PERFECT baby 😂.
Instead of putting him down again and continuing the battle of wills, I took him out of his crib and we played. At nearly 11 pm, after a REALLY long day, we spent a solid twenty minutes staring at each other, giggling and smiling, playing peak-a-boo, and babbling back and forth.
Sometimes I feel guilty for how little one-on-one attention he gets from me. I know that comes with the territory of being a second child, but I feel like it’s a little more extreme in his case because he is SO chill all the time and will contently sit in his little play-chair for hours while I’m busy doing a million other things (and also because Lydia is quite good at demanding my attention these days 😂).
I don’t dwell on this guilt often because I know there’s not much I can do about it, but I’m realizing more and more just how fleeting this stage of motherhood really is. People always say that, but it really is so true. It’s crazy! Those squishy, baby-soft cheeks and thighs won’t last forever. Every part of motherhood is just a phase - the good and the bad, and it will all be over before I know it. Last night served as a little reminder for to try a little harder to cherish the sweet moments when they come - even when they are inconvenient and mean leaving my ever-growing to-do list for another day.
_ _ _
han.
Wilton Animal Crackers Pan
THE FALL LEAVES 😍😍// When Lucca called Elliott "the jolly guy" // when Lydia offers to cuddle me so she can watch TV "for two minutes" //dinner with my Jeru Roomies // #ldsconf // when Lydia says "I wike it!!"// bake-at-home cinnamon rolls that are all of the 😋 and none of the 💪🏻 (or mess!) // Lydia watching Kiki in the dryer // Elliott laughing when Lydia jumps around the house // the bird show at the zoo // visiting @thedaintypear + her cute family // blackberries on sale // jalapeno cheetos on a peanut butter sandwich
I think it's high time these lists were reinstated, what think ye?!
_ _ _
han.
When I agreed to scheduling our wedding the day AFTER my birthday, I had only one stipulation:
We were NOT allowed to combine my birthday celebration with our anniversary celebration.
Obviously, I was highly against the idea of getting gypped out of two HIGHLY necessary celebrations. At some point (while we were engaged) we agreed that we would celebrate future anniversaries at the end of the April, when we got engaged, so that we could spread out the celebrations and have more to celebrate year round.
And so that was the plan! ...until we realized that that meant celebrating our "one year anniversary" only six months after getting married. ha. Every year we say we're going to celebrate in April, and every year it just feels awkward and we don't. And when our anniversary comes around we usually don't do much since we just celebrated my birthday...and it becomes EXACTLY WHAT WE SWORE WOULD NEVER HAPPEN😑.
And so that was the plan! ...until we realized that that meant celebrating our "one year anniversary" only six months after getting married. ha. Every year we say we're going to celebrate in April, and every year it just feels awkward and we don't. And when our anniversary comes around we usually don't do much since we just celebrated my birthday...and it becomes EXACTLY WHAT WE SWORE WOULD NEVER HAPPEN😑.
This year, though, I was determined to make our anniversary special! When I realized my parents were going to be in town for my Grandpa's Rasband's birthday party the weekend of our four-year anniversary, I coordinated with my mom to have her and my dad stay with Lydia and Elliott and planned a little surprise getaway for Stephen and me. It was a blast! We did a "zipline tour" in Park City (sounds a lot cooler than it is hahaha, see video) and then spent the night at the Zermatt Resort in Midway! Considering it was our first time away from Lydia overnight, AND the first time we'd stayed in a hotel since our Honeymoon...it was long overdue!
Here's a little VLOG I made throughout the busy and fun-filled week!
PS I just noticed that this video has a thumbs down and I actually started laughing OUT LOUD. Some people have way too much time on their hands 😂😂😂
_ _ _
han
I've been so busy lately concentrating on instagram and growing my youtube channel (oh yeah, and being a mom of two under two 😅😂) that I'm afraid I've let this little blog of mine fall through the cracks. I really don't want to let it die completely, but I'm not sure I'll be able to consistently make time to post new content on it, so I'm going to start posting my instagram photos here as well. For those of you who already follow me on instgram, these posts might feel a little redundant, but I have a few siblings who STILL don't have instagram (no matter how much I plead for them to jump on the wagon ;)) AND since instagram's feed is no longer in chronological order, it might be nice for people to keep track of it on here. Most of all though, this space is still primary my "life story" if you will, and I think it will be nice to have more of my story in one place. (I'm going to try to be better about posting my youtube videos here right away as well.)
To take full advantage of this moment with both kids napping, I'll provide a quick update: Life is GREAT. We have love love loved the addition of Elliott to our little family and he continues to be the happiest, chillest, and chunkiest baby ever. I would guess he is WEEKS away from surpassing Lydia in weight and I daresay his head is already bigger than hers. haha! Stephen continues to work long and hard for our family and we have LOVED the long summer days that have allowed us to get out of the house after he's home and still have hours of daylight to hit up the splash pad or the slide at a nearby park. Thinking about the fact that soon he will be coming home after dark already has me a little apprehensive (is it just me, or do days seem to DRAG AND DRAG when the sun is out for such a short time?). Thankfully I feel like the kids and I are in a really good routine (although don't ask me how I feel on Friday - SNOW is in the forecast😭!!!) and we are SO GRATEFUL to be living in our apartment with so many friends around during the day.
Thanks for being here and I'm really hoping to back here again SOON!
_ _ _
han.
This evening, entirely unprompted, you grabbed a book off of the shelf and took it to the couch to read to Elliott while Dad and I were finishing up dinner. You draped a burp rag over your legs like a tiny blanket and flipped through the pages of the book, showing Elliott the animal on each page and making their sound. When you finished the first book, you wrapped the "blanket" around Elliott and walked across the room to the bookshelf to get another. The stack of books next to you grew as Dad and I watched, and we silently mouthed to each other just how blessed we are to have two incredible babies, not wanting to ruin the moment by making a peep. We smiled and each other and agreed (yet again) that you are, without a doubt, THE BEST big sister.
_ _ _
han
A few weeks ago we went to the zoo with my brother Daniel and his wife Olivia. We've been taking full advantage of our zoo passes, going half an hour to an hour before closing, so meeting up with them there on a Saturday morning was quite different than what we've been getting used to (i.e. crowded, haha). We still had a ton of fun AND we got to watch the Sea Lion show which Lydia LOVED. She was attentive the whole time and kept saying "More! More! More!" 😂
I asked Daniel and Olivia to bring along their selfie stick, and I used it to record footage throughout the day. Lydia took a little while to warm up to the camera, but she was a fan of the selfie stick from the start, haha. She kept gabbing it during the videos so if you're wondering why the camera moves really close to my face at any point, you can thank her for that!
I can't decide if I like "vlogging" like this more or less than just posting to instagram stories. Recording and editing a video is a ton more work, but I do like that it doesn't go away after 24 hours, and I feel like we're much more likely to rewatch videos like this as a family than we are to watch 10 second clips that saved to my phone from my stories?! (Like taking pictures (instastories) vs. printing and scrapbooking them (vlogging).) I keep going back and forth on how I feel. haha. Input is always appreciated ;)
_ _ _
han.
A few weeks ago Stephen and I were sitting out on the balcony watching Lydia play in a small bucket of dirty water and we decided to film a video talking all about Lydia. Although it didn't feel like it (Stephen agrees!!!), we ended up with almost 25 minutes of footage (🙈) so I did my best to narrow it down to closer to about six minutes, but I realize it is STILL one of those videos that is going to be infinitely more entertaining for parents and grandparents (and hopefully her someday) than for anyone else. haha. (In other words, if you think it is boring, I will do my best to refrain from saying "I told you so." ;))
It's crazy how much Lydia has changed just in the last three weeks since this was filmed! Very few things we talk about in the video are still true, and she knows SO MANY more words now, but it just makes me glad we filmed it when we did because every stage at this age is so fleeting!
Oh how we love our Lydia Girl!
_ _ _
han.
Last night, on a spur-of-the-moment decision, we headed to the zoo.
As in, at 3:47 pm the decision was made, and by 4:07 pm I had both kiddos loaded in the car and we were pulling out of our apartment complex parking lot to pick up Stephen. THIS IS MONUMENTAL. I don't think I've ever gotten the kids out the door and in the car that quickly AND at least seven of those minutes were spent TRYING TO FOLD UP THE DANG STROLLER. 🙈 I didn't realize that I had the seats on backwards, and needless to say, I'm 100% certain any passerby would have gotten a good laugh watching me wrestle that badboy into the back of the car. (Although I wouldn't have taken it very well because I was both mentally and physically heated by the end 😅 but I am CLEARLY getting off topic.)
For Stephen's birthday Mom and Dad Olson gifted him (aka us) passes to the Zoo, and we hadn't been back since the day before Elliott was born. And since Stephen was having a slow day at work (which rarely happens!), we decided to take full advantage and head to the zoo.
Stephen LOVES the zoo. His family lived just a few miles away when he was little and he has lots of fond memories of going to the zoo. He wouldn't hesitate to spend all day there if he could!
...I can't say I share the same level of excitement ;) but I love how much he loves the zoo, and the fact that Lydia is starting to catch on is, obviously, an added bonus for both of us.
We made it to the zoo about an hour before closing and it was PERFECT. Perfect because the hottest part of the day was over. Perfect because the crowds had gone home for the day (as in, we were some of the only people there!). And perfect because it was an hour. ;) If every zoo trip could be like this one - I'd go every week!
Although it might be argued that Lydia's favorite part of the outing was running from one set of stairs to the next (that girl and her stairs obsession!) she also got a plethora of opportunities to show off her lion, elephant, owl, monkey, and cat sounds. And watching her wave to a seal while exclaiming "HI!" just about melted my heart.
^^Lydia would also point and say "GUG!" every time we passed one of these mechanical bugs that are currently on display. (And I would still like to know - WHY?! They are both pointless and slight disturbing, IMO.)
As the zoo was nearing closing, we headed toward the exit, and Lydia spotted the carousel. She pointed at it and then ran towards it, eyes wide with excitement. I don't even know how she knew what it was or that it was something she should be excited about, but she walked right over to it and tried to get through the gate! Not wanting to pay the fee to ride it, and knowing that there was a strong possibility she wouldn't actually like it, we were about to turn her attention to something else, when the worker running the carousel invited her on board - free of charge! Much to my (happy) surprise, SHE LOVED IT. Her huge smile when she came around the bend gave me GOOSEBUMPS. Oh how I love that girl. Oh how I love my sweet little family.
And (dare I say it?!) oh how I love the zoo.
_ _ _
han.
Stephen and I were some of the first of our friend group to start having kids, and while we are by no means experts, we have learned a thing or two about the newborn stage that I would have loved to know sooner. Recently, many of our friends have announced that they are expecting, so I wanted to make a quick video with a few things that we've found helpful with our two kiddos.
The problem with making videos like this is that somewhere between the filming and the posting I think of about 10 more things I wish I had included, so I've already started a list of things to include in my PART II video on the same topic. 😂
MY FAVORITE NEWBORN ITEMS/HACKS!
Below are (affiliate) links to some items I mentioned in the video, as well as a few other items you might find useful!
The swing we are currently borrowing (Elliott LOVES it): http://amzn.to/2t1JFlT
SleepSack Swaddle: http://amzn.to/2sN9fad <-- I forgot to mention that it's important to be care of what you put in a load of laundry with a velcro swaddle because it's very likely the velcro will attach to another article of clothing and may cause some damage depending on the material 😬
I mentioned that I like to keep my newborns right next to me, and I do this by a combination of cosleeping and using my co-sleeper crib: http://amzn.to/2t1PKib
The wrap I have: http://amzn.to/2sNiF5l
A carrier I've heard people LOVE: http://amzn.to/2t1HKNW
Can you think of anything else I should be sure to include in my next video?! Thanks for watching!
_ _ _han.
I received a free professional teeth whitening system from Smile Brilliant in exchange for writing a review on my blog.
My younger brother Daniel got married this past weekend. (WHAT.) I'm going to do a separate post all about the wedding weekend, but during the weeks leading up to the wedding I spent a significant amount of time putting together a slideshow of photos for the wedding luncheon comprised of pictures of Daniel and his wife(!!) Olivia's growing-up years.
The first thing I noticed was Rebekah's outfit. But then I noticed my outfit, then Sarah's, then Daniels... Before long I was nearly crying - sitting on my bed in the middle of the night, by myself, trying not to laugh too loudly to wake up my two sleeping children.
The sad funny thing is, I totally remember that shirt. And I remember wearing it often 🙈 , not just on family vacations where it was safe to bet I wouldn't see any of these people again. But not only was my outfit choice questionable...WHAT IS MY SMILE DOING?!?!? Am I happy? Am I in pain? No one will ever know. 😂
High school (when this photo was taken) is a time when it seems like insecurities are on display for all the world to see! And one of my biggest insecurities during high school was my smile.
Can you guess why?!
I'll give you a hint...
THAT TINY LITTLE GAP!
I can't even tell you how many hours were spent in front of the mirror practicing smiles that could potentially draw attention to the dimple on my right cheek and away from that tiny space. 🙈 (A space that I now realize likely went entirely unnoticed by anyone other than me. 🙄)
I was one the of the few in my friend group who never had braces or retainers to make my teeth perfectly straight, so I guess you could say over-analyzing my smile was a fairly common pastime.
When I got to college, however, I started worrying less about that tiny gap between my two front teeth and more about the coloring of my teeth. I would often compare the brightness of my smile with other people's and get really self-conscious when it didn't measure up.
A few months ago, I was approached by a teeth whitening company called Smile Brilliant, that offers a professional teeth whitening system that can be done entirely from home. As someone who tends to avoid the dentist as much as possible (😬) I thought this was a great option for me! It had been a little over 5 years since I'd done any teeth-whitening, and I was excited to try something new. Smile Brilliant was kind enough to send me all the materials needed to provide me with a whiter, brighter smile from home!
A few months ago, I was approached by a teeth whitening company called Smile Brilliant, that offers a professional teeth whitening system that can be done entirely from home. As someone who tends to avoid the dentist as much as possible (😬) I thought this was a great option for me! It had been a little over 5 years since I'd done any teeth-whitening, and I was excited to try something new. Smile Brilliant was kind enough to send me all the materials needed to provide me with a whiter, brighter smile from home!
You can read more about how the process works by visiting the Smile Brilliant Website, but to sum up my experience, I have been extremely pleased with the results! (I particularly loved feeling like a dental assistant at the beginning of the process when I got to take impressions of my own teeth, and fulfill my life-long dream of having whitening trays that look a lot like retainers (although serve an entirely different purpose), hahaha. Stephen thought I was being a little ridiculous with how giddy I was when I put my whitening trays in for the first time and was expressing my excitement about how my voice sounded while I was wearing them. 😂
I really enjoyed my experience with Smile Brilliant's teeth whitening system. I found it was very effective and I only had a few, very minor issues with teeth/gums sensitivity (although I know that varies a lot from person to person). The hardest part for me was simply remembering to put the trays in! I typically delay getting ready for bed until the last minute possible, but to get the best results with this system you want to leave the whitening gel on your teeth from 30 minutes-2 hours, and the desensitizing gel for an additional 30 minutes, so Stephen would often have to help me remember to start the process shortly after finishing dinner.
One thing I think is important to mention is that your teeth will look a little speckled after applying the whitening gel. This worried me initially because I thought the speckled parts would stay whiter and my teeth would look that way permanently. I emailed the company and was assured that this was normal! It turns out that the whitening process temporarily dehydrates the teeth, which can appear as white spots or patches. When your teeth remineralize and re-hydrate, the speckles go away! (The desensitizing gel that comes with the kit also helps re-hydrate your teeth.)
Although it doesn't look like anything drastic, I've definitely been able to see a whiter smile develop over the past few weeks!
If you want to try out Smile Brilliant's teeth whitening System for yourself, enter my giveaway!
...Now if only I could say that was the end of all of my insecurities... 😏😅😂
_ _ _
han.
Home Teeth Whitening
. . . is daily denial at how big Elliott is getting.
. . . is aiming for under 10 minutes to get from our front door to buckled in the car.
. . . is taking full advantage of the double stroller - but only on the days that aren't too hot or too cold.
. . . is an overflowing diaper bag.
. . . is trying to keep my cool whenever Lydia discovers something new she can climb.
. . . is saying multiple prayers at every meal and nap time, per Lydia's request.
. . . is keeping a close eye on how aggressively Lydia is showing Elliott her love.
. . . is a heart bursting with pride every time Lydia says a new word.
. . . is a lap full of kids, one nursing, the other turning pages in a book.
. . . is going to the fire station to look at the fire trucks.
. . . is wearing Elliott in the wrap while teaching primary.
. . . is sleeping every night between my two favorite boys.
. . . is hearing Elliott's coos and attempting to record all of his smiles to show Stephen.
. . . is reminding Lydia to say "please" and "thank you."
. . . is smothering two little people with kisses all day long.
. . . is feeling like my heart just might burst on the daily.
_ _ _
han.
I can't believe it's almost been three weeks since Elliott was born! The days have literally flown by. We were so incredibly blessed to have Mom Olson with us for six days after he was born and then Mom Flinders for 10 days after that! We were so spoiled! I've tried to use any spare time I've had the last few weeks to record details about the birth (on my phone) since everything fades so quickly, and as ridiculous as this novel is, I'm sure I've left things out! Obviously there are wayyy more details in this post than the average person cares to know, but it's important to me to have all the details in one place! So...here we go!
This time my due date came and went and to be honest I felt weirdly calm about everything. With Lydia, I had thoroughly convinced myself she was going to come before the due date, so everyday for WEEKS before she came I told myself, "Today's the day!" and then it wasn't...and wasn't...and wasn't. By the time her due date finally came I was pretty beaten down, depressed, frustrated, and quite honestly annoyed! It was in that state that I was talked into hiking the Y, drinking the caster oil drink etc...But you can read alllllll about that here, if you care to be reminded of the details surrounding that birth. ;)
With Elliott things were different. I pretty much expected to go past my due date this time, I just had no idea how long. I actually agreed to photograph a wedding ON the due date (obviously I had back-up in place in case I couldn't make it!) and I think a good part of me would have been disappointed had I not been able to make it to the wedding. As soon as the wedding ended and we were driving home, however, I started sending vibes to Babyboy that any time from here on out would be an appropriate time for him to make his debut. ☺️
On Tuesday morning I went to a trampoline park with a friend. She had texted me on Monday and invited me and Lydia to come with her and her daughter and I thought that was an excellent idea! It gave me something to do and there was a chance jumping on a tramoline might help move things along, so it was a win-win! (Plus, Lydia loooves trampolines.) We had fun at the park, but zero contractions (even when I was jumping!) so I don't think it made any difference for Elliott, haha. That night Mom Olson flew in so again I did my best to send the "Come on, baby!" vibes.
Wednesday morning I had a doctor's appointment. I had been "at about a one" for three-ish weeks so although I didn't foresee the baby coming that day, I hoped the doctor would give news of some progress. NOTHING. I asked my doctor if he would strip my membranes to possibly encourage things along, but he said stripping membranes is only effective about half of the time and always causes cramping and bleeding. He also said my cervix was "still pretty far back" so he was fairly confident it wouldn't be effective. (As a side note, while he was saying all of this, it occurred to me that most doctors probably aren't as gung-ho about stripping membranes as my doctor was when I had Lydia. My OB with Lydia stripped my membranes FOUR times, which, looking back, I'm 100% sure he did because he knew he was going out of town and really wanted her to come before he did! And yes. Cramping and bleeding were very present during the last few weeks of that pregnancy, but I just attributed that to the fact that I was nearing delivery and had no clue that it had anything to do with my membranes being stripped.)
That appointment (the whole 4 minutes that it lasted) was pretty discouraging. I broke down in the bathroom on my way out. I still wasn't NEARLY the wreck I had been when I was overdue with Lydia, but I was starting to get frustrated that NO progress had been made. I felt particularly anxious to get things moving now that Mom Olson was here to help! I really wanted to feel like her time was being used productively both for her sake, and mine! Basically, I left the doctor's office feeling like the baby wasn't coming out ANY time soon. I tried to pull it together (i.e. stop crying) but I broke down again in the car as I was texting Stephen about the appointment, and then a few minutes later when I met Lydia and Mom Olson at the park. Thankfully, it only took a few hours to mostly get out of the funk.
That night as I was semi-venting to Stephen about the fact that I felt like this baby was still WEEKS away, he suggested I go to the temple Thursday morning which was, of course, the perfect suggestion.
I woke up Thursday morning and decided it was time to start taking matters into my own hands. After dropping Stephen off at the train station, I stopped at the grocery store and purchased the ingredients for the infamous caster oil drink that seemed to get things moving with Lydia. I knew it wasn't going to send my body into labor, but I was hopeful it might help things start moving along. The drink (in case you don't remember) consists of: half a can of kern's nectar, two tablespoons almond butter, two tablespoons caster oil, and lemon verbena oil (which I don't have, so I just used lemon juice, haha). It actually didn't taste as bad as I had remembered it!
I went to the temple (per Stephen's suggestion) and did initiatories. Always a good idea, and something I had done regularly during the weeks leading up to Lydia's birth to help calm any potential fears I had about approaching an unmedicated labor.
A little after getting home I started having some contractions! They were very sporadic and not strong at all, but I noticed that they were mostly in my back. I knew from my labor with Lydia that having back contractions can be a sign that the baby is in a poor position, maybe facing the wrong way. The fact that Elliott wasn't in the right position made sense to me. I felt fairly confidant that reason my body wasn't progressing towards labor was because he wasn't in the correct position. (Obviously, I have no way of knowing if this is actually true, but it sounded good to me, haha.) I asked a couple friends about what I could do to encourage him to get into a better position and I was told to try looking on the website spinningbabies.com for some specific suggestions. Most of the "exercises" require another person to assist so when Stephen got home from work we tried to follow the instructions on the website but mostly didn't have a clue what we were doing and felt really silly. Haha. (One of them has you put a blanket over your stomach and have the other person tug on either side of the blanket to rock the baby into place hahaha, yes it felt as ridiculous as it sounds.) That night I also successfully talked Stephen into massaging different pressure points I found in a YouTube video as a means to get things moving. (I don't think it did anything, but any excuse for a massage is good in my book! haha)
Friday morning my friend Stacie offered to help me with the spinning babies thing because she was more familiar with the exercises than I was. I don't know if it was directly related to any of the things I'd done, but after a few hours the contractions were where they were supposed to be!
The rest of Friday was fairly uneventful. Mom Olson and I went on a walk. I tried a much more delicious "labor" drink a friend suggested (it had walnuts, ginger, and brown sugar -- I actually drank this one willingly without any complaint, haha). And that night Stephen and I test drove a car that we ended up purchasing the following week!
On Saturday morning (now 5 days overdue) I had another mini breakdown. I told Stephen that I thought my body was still days or even weeks away from having a baby! Again, I was feeling pretty good physically, I was just frustrated that I had had help with us for three full days and still no baby! Obviously, Mom Olson was still a huge help with Lydia, and we loved having her here, I just felt silly for having her come all this way with zero signs of a baby! What if it the time came for her to leave and the baby still hadn't come?! I was also starting to stress a little because Dad Olson was set to fly in on the 13 for the baby blessing and there might not be a baby to bless by then! Thankfully Stephen calmed me down (he's the best) and I got it together for a good day.
It was Mom Olson's birthday, and we had plans go to the zoo! After a relaxing morning and Lydia's (really long) nap, to the zoo we went! The last time Lydia went to a zoo she was 6 months old, so she was a lot more entertaining to watch this time around. Haha. It was a ton of fun! I had a handful of contractions as we walked up a hill in the back part of the zoo, but other than that, nada.
On the way home we grabbed some Thai food to-go. Mom Olson got looots of siracha sauce in case I wanted to try the spicy food route. Haha. (I thought the green curry had the perfect amount of spice without the siracha for the record ;))
After dinner I decided that I had nothing to lose by drinking the caster oil drink again. I still had all the ingredients and I still didn't think it was going to send me into labor, but I wanted to feel like I was making an effort to push things along! This time the drink was particularly nasty for some reason. It was a struggle to choke it down, but I powered through!
Mom and Sarah (Stephen's sister who had joined us for the zoo outing) headed to the store to pick up some moose tracks ice cream for a birthday treat. While they were gone I asked Stephen to give me a priesthood blessing. He said he would but he also (somewhat jokingly) said that he couldn't force Elliott come tonight in the blessing. I laughed and said I knew that, but I wanted him to bless Elliott to be in the proper position so when he did come there wouldn't be any problems, and the birth would be able to go forward as I'd planned.
I went to sleep around 11:30 and then woke up at about three. As had been my habit the previous few weeks, I laid there for a minute trying to figure out what had woken me up. And, like every single previous instance, it was because I needed to pee. I went to the bathroom and got back in bed, bummed that I hadn't woken up due to a contraction, and then I had a contraction! Hooray! Haha. I went back to sleep (hoping that a contraction would wake me up) and sure enough, about a half an hour later I woke up again with another contraction! I laid in bed for a few minutes, had another contraction, and then had to go to the bathroom. I tried not to read into the fact that I needed to poop at 3:45 am, but I was obviously hopeful that this was a sign my body was preparing for labor.
I got back in bed again and slept for another 20 minutes or so and then woke up from another contraction. After laying in bed for a while continuing to have (mild) contractions, I decided to take a bath. I don't totally know the reason, but I've heard that getting in the water will sometimes help the contractions subside if they aren't the real deal? Or it soothes them if they are? I don't know if either of those things are even remotely true, haha, but whatever the reason, I got in the bath.
In the bath I listened to a few general conference talks, since it was Sunday, afterall. I listened to this talk by Elder Holland to start, which was given just a few weeks before Lydia was born, and if you haven't heard I highly recommend.
At about 5:30 am I got out of the bath and woke up Stephen to give him the update. I told him I wasn't 100% sure this was the real deal, but that I had been contracting fairly regularly for a few hours. He started timing the contractions on his phone and they were coming about five minutes apart and were lasting between 35-45 seconds. I got back in bed but quickly realized that laying down was not a pleasant laboring position, so I didn't last that way for long. I much preferred bouncing on an exercise ball or standing and leaning against a wall/Stephen during contractions. After timing them for about an hour and seeing them get longer, stronger and more frequent, we decided that this was really happening -- it was just a matter of how long I wanted to stay home before heading to the hospital!
We spent the next few hours casually packing the hospital bag and tidying up around the house. It was hard to pack the hospital bag in advance because so much of the stuff I wanted to take was stuff I needed everyday (i.e hairbrush, toothbrush, camera, phone charger, etc). My cousin Kimberly suggested making a list of things I was going to need and then packing it when the day arrived and I'm so glad that's what we did! I really liked having an objective while the contractions were continuing to pick up.
Lydia woke up around 8 and would get mad every time she saw me on the exercise ball (she thinks it's hers and is very protective of it) and every time Stephen would hug me during a contraction (she is equally as protective of his affection, hahaha). We found it really funny but she did not. ha!
Just before 9, Mom Olson left with Lydia for church (Grandpa Olson had been kind enough to lend her his car while she was staying with us). We finished tidying up the apartment, did one last check to make sure we had everything we needed, and then decided to head to the hospital. When we got in the car we said a prayer that our car would make it there. Haha. My poor little '98 Honda Accord had had the "check engine" light on for days and from the way it was violently shifting gears, or choosing not to shift gears at all, we knew the transmission was basically shot.
Thankfully, we made it to the hospital without any problems (#powerofprayer), but of course the whole way there I was questioning weather or not it was really time to be heading to the hospital! I was so terrified I would get there and they would tell me I was at a 2 and send me home! I knew it really wouldn't be that big of a deal if I was sent home, but I just really didn't want that to happen. Among other reasons, I had coordinated with some girls in my building to watch Lydia after church so Mom Olson could come to the hospital, so going back home empty handed would have been quite embarrassing. Ha.
When we got to the check-in desk at labor and delivery there were approximately 15 women standing behind it in scrubs. Apparently the computer inputting system had been changed the day before so they were all helping each other navigate through the new system. The whole time we were checking in (which took almost 10 minutes, despite the fact that I had preregistered) I only had ONE contraction, and it wasn't even a very long one! The lady asked me to sign a paper and then I started having a contraction so I just closed my eyes and leaned against the desk and after 20 seconds or so I opened my eyes, took the pen, and then signed the paper. I am 100% sure at least half of the women behind the desk were rolling their eyes and thinking "Oh honey, you are NOT in labor." 🙈
I got into the room and changed into the oh-so-flattering hospital gown. A little while later my nurse Katelynn came in. She was super nice and I still want to be her friend in real life, haha. I told her that I was so afraid I was going to be at a 2 and be sent home and she just laughed and said that if I was it wouldn't be a big deal. After I was all hooked up to the monitors so they could watch the contractions and the baby's heart rate, she checked me and she said, "You're most definitely not at a 2! You're at a 6!" 💃🏻💃🏻 I was soooo relieved that I was actually in labor and that I WOULD have a baby before leaving the hospital!
Since I tested positive for GBS, they gave me an IV and started administering penicillin. After about 20 minutes it was I was unhooked from the monitors so I could move freely.
They brought in an exercise ball (at my request) but it was a little small/deflated so I didn't like laboring on it as much as I had at home. Instead, I preferred leaning against the bed, against Stephen, or kneeling on the bed.
Mom Olson arrived around 11:15 and my friend Sue, who was kind enough to come take pictures for us, arrived at about noon. Since we opted to go without a doula this time, I was glad Sue was able to come because she had two of her children unmedicated, and it was comforting to have a visual reminder that birth is normal, natural, and healthy! (Plus, the pictures she took are 👌🏼.)
The next few hours the four of us chatted and I would pause occasionally to breathe through a contraction. It was still fairly easy for me to keep up with the conversation through them, and occasionally I would even contribute a few words during a contraction, so things were going very smoothly.
A little after 2 I felt like things were picking up significantly. I obviously wasn't in the "pushing stage" but the contractions started to feel different and more intense. I called my nurse in to check me and she said I was at a 6+. I'm sure she added the plus just to be nice 😂 . I was maybe a tad discouraged I hadn't made much noticeable progress in the few hours I'd been at the hospital, but I was pretty confident that things were moving along just fine. Katelynn was super supportive and believed that things were going to go fast once they started happening, so she told the front desk to call my doctor. A few minutes later the front desk responded to say that my doctor was going to wait to come until there was "significant progress." Totally understandable, but as I overheard this conversation I had the very clear thought that he wasn't going to make it in time.
Katelynn suggested I labor on hands and knees on the bed because she said when she had checked me she thought the baby's head was tilted slightly. A few minutes after she left, the contractions became more intense. It started taking all of my concentration to breathe through them. One of the other nurses suggested to have Stephen and Mom Olson apply pressure to either side of my lower back during these more-intense contractions and I am SO grateful she suggested that! It was so so helpful! After about 20 minutes of these more-intense contractions I called Katelynn in again and said that I felt like the pushing stage was getting pretty close! She checked me again and said I was at a 9! She said that I should "try to not push" if the urge came since there was still a little bit of cervix in the way and I chuckled to myself remembering how well that went last time.... Ha. (It didn't.)
A minute later I said, "I think I need to push!...Or maybe I need to poop!...Not sure if I need to push, but I definitely need to poop!" Katelyn laughed and said, "I've heard that before! You're definitely about to have a baby!"
I turned over so I was laying in the bed. Katelynn was entering something into the computer when all of a sudden HE WAS COMING. I said to Katelyn, "He's coming right now!" She moved the blanket and sure enough, there was his head! Katelyn put a hand on his head (holding him there?! I'm not actually sure why, haha) And very calmly asked Mom Olson to go over and push "the pink button." Within seconds of the pink button being pressed, the doors swung open and about 7 people rushed into the room, one of which was the on-call doctor who came into the room holding her hands up and saying, "Gloves! Gloves! I need gloves, any gloves!"
(I only know that part of the story because Mom Olson recounted it later, haha, I was a little distracted by other things at that particular moment, lol.)
Elliott's head came so fast and I wasn't expecting it all to happen so quickly that it, quite literally, took my breath away! I honestly forgot how to breathe for a few seconds! And then not being able to breathe made me slightly panic. Katelynn remained very calm and reminded me to breathe. Thankfully it only took a second for me to remember how to breathe, haha, and I asked if someone would count. During the pushing stage with Lydia one of the nurses counted each time I pushed and I remembered it being SO helpful!
..Let's just say, there wasn't much time to count. Another push and some involuntary noises came out of my mouth. haha! 🙊 It definitely wasn't a scream, but with each push came a low noise (groan?) that I seriously didn't recognize and definitely didn't anticipate! The doctor (who thankfully found some gloves, haha) came over to the foot off the bed and cheerfully said, "If you picked your knees up, he'd come right out!" (As she said it I remember thinking how silly it was of me to be laying on my back with my legs flat on the bed.
I picked up my knees as suggested, gave one more push and out he flew! Elliott Allred was born at 2:57 pm, weighing 7 pounds, 15 ounces, (just 5 ounces less than Lydia's birthweight) -- about two minutes after the doctor had come into the room!
I did tear a little bit, but the doctor said the tear wasn't bleeding, so she guessed I just re-tore along part of where I'd torn with Lydia. While she gave me a few stitches I held Elliott for the first time! Everything was perfect!! Within a minute of him being born, Elliott pooped, just a small foreshadowing of the weeks to come ;)
(Next came my LEAST favorite part of the whole experience - when the nurses push on the stomach to help uterus contract back down and make sure it is soft. I seriously hate that part.)
About an hour and a half later they moved me to the recovery room. It just so happened that my mom was flying in that day for a surprise birthday party for one of my aunts, so she came by with my Grandma and Grandpa Rasband after they picked her up from the airport! Mom Olson had gone back to pick up Lydia from a friend's and brought her back so we all got to watch Lydia meet Elliott for the first time and I thought my heart was going to burst! Lydia didn't totally understand who Elliott was I'm sure, but she she loves babies, so she was really excited about him, and it was beyond adorable.
Overall, everything with this birth went much smoother than with Lydia's. (And I would say her birth went relatively smoothly aside from the little bit when we were told to prepare for an emergency C-section.) I'm not sure what can be attributed to the fact that it was a second birth, a smaller baby, and the lack of medical intervention/epidural, but the recovery this time around has been GREAT! Within a few hours of Elliott's arrival I was walking around and it little to no pain. I took the ibuprofen that the nurses offered every 8 hours, but every time they asked me to rate my level of pain I said 0 and I really meant it! Obviously there were a few days over the next few weeks where I felt a bit sore, but by far the worst part of the days immediately following the birth were the post-labor contractions! I had been warned about many times and were indeed more prevalent than any post-labor contractions I had experienced with Lydia. (Yes, I am fully aware they get worse with each kid and I am already dreading it.) I always assumed that people wore "belly bands" after labor for purely cosmetic reasons, but I decided to put one on as a way to apply constant pressure on my back and I actually thought it helped a lot! It's funny too because I feel like I was constantly complaining about the post-labor contractions, but I never once did I complain about a contraction being uncomfortable during labor. In my opinion, it really just goes to show that mindset it KEY! (And also proves that I do not have an abnormally high pain tolerance, haha.)
In summary, the human body is amazing and I'm so grateful to have Elliott here, happy and healthy! (And best of all - sleepy ;))
So far we think being a family of four is pretty great!
So far we think being a family of four is pretty great!
_ _ _
han.
Well, we meet again, post-due-date-day-5.
Or is it really post-due-date-day-3 since my original due date was May 3rd?
Either way, we're here again in that awkward mental space, waiting for a newborn to arrive.
And yet, this time is so so different.
I've been trying to explain to Stephen exactly all the ways it feels so different this time around, but I'm having trouble finding the words.
Yes, there have been tears, but the ache and frustration and anger(?) that I felt in those last days and weeks waiting for Lydia is not here this time, and for that I am (obviously) very grateful. I'm not sure if it's just because I understand better and am more open to the idea that babies come on their own (aka the Lord's) timeline, or the fact that I'm not yet at the same level of physical discomfort I felt during the last weeks of my pregnancy with Lydia. But either way, I'm weirdly at peace that this baby is taking his sweet time.**
I had been pretty excited about the idea of him being born on Lydia's half birthday (which was maybe yesterday or today depending on what/who you ask, haha) but at this point I see that is not going to happen. I guess this little guy wants to have a day all to HIMSELF, and really, I can't blame him ;)
All that being said, it would be awfully nice if he would make his debut sooner rather than later since I have Grandma here willing and waiting to help!
Ready when you are BabyBoy!
_ _ _
han.
**at least for now 😜
Ohhhh videos and my love/hate relationship with them. haha. I love making them, and just when I think I'm finally getting the hang of making sure the light and audio levels are good...we record this one and it is borderline disaster. (One step forward, two steps back, I guess 😅.) Thankfully I at least had the foresight to use my phone to record the audio as a backup - if I hadn't, the whole thing would have been completely unusable. The lighting is not great, but I was able to at least brighten it some by taking it into Lightroom and messing around with the settings. (Granted, I know the colors look a little weird, but trust me when I say it looks much better than the original.)
All in all it was a good lesson in getting all my settings right in-camera because I could have saved myself A LOT of time in post-production! If the video had been a different format I probably would have made us redo it, but due to it being a question/answer type format there really wasn't a way to "recreate it" and have it be authentic. Plus, DONE IS FUN! RIGHT?!
Anyway, I'm not saying all that to make excuses, I'm just saying it to point out the fact that making these videos may not always (ever) be as "effortless" as it seems. haha.
Thanks to all the people on instagram who encouraged me to push through with the editing even though I was ready to call defeat!
And now we wait for BabyBoy!
(...who officially has a name!
...I think!)
_ _ _
han.
Lydia's hair when she wakes up each morning never ceases to impress! Especially now that I usually put it in a ponytail during the day and take it out just before bed - the shape of the ponytail combined with static from Lydia jumping around in her crib (that still has a blanket over the top of it to block out the light) is quite a great combination! Here are some snapshots from the past few months:
I am always so bad at doing the monthly updates. It's really overwhelming to me to try to sum Lydia's current stage in a single blogpost, so I put it off until another month passes and end up not recording anything because I couldn't record everything. It's a vicious cycle and it makes me sad because I'm sure I'll forget so many of the hilarious things she does over the years! I'm giving myself five minutes to make a list of what Lydia's up to right now and although it will be far from complete I'm not going to let myself stress about it...
(Note: She's not actually 18 months yet, she will be in about 2 weeks, but labeling this a 17.5 month update just felt plain silly.)
Lydia currently....
LOVES being outside more than anything. Her favorite word is "GO!" and will bring me my shoes and her shoes and pack the diaper bag if I even hint at the idea of going out.
LOVES BABIES. It doesn't matter if they are older than her and/or bigger than her. She points out babies left and right and gets really sad when a baby that she points out gets out of eyesight.
Loves Costco samples. She's a fairly picky eater at home, but at Costco...she is willing try anything and usually likes it!
Is very tidy. She will often refuse to do anything until all of the drawers and doors are closed. She also really loves to wipe up the floor, counter, and her face.
Is a very good helper. She loves to help move the laundry and empty the dishwasher. Having her help makes these tasks much more enjoyable for me too so it's a win-win!
Is officially down to one nap per day and it ranges from 45 minutes-3 hours... we're working on it. ha
Says the following words: (this is a quick list and I'm sure it's missing some)
thank you, ball, hi, bye, mommy (mama) (mom), daddy, baby, doggie, ducky (often sounds exactly like doggie haha), uh oh, Kiki, ya, no, ow!, ohhhh, keys, kiss, snow, go, meow, okay, more, cheese, pop(corn), bubble, tree, i love you, me, papa (meaning grandpa..or, old man, hahaha), babo (which is the closest she could get to grandma) and lately she's working on saying "Lydia"...but it's proving to be a toughy. She's getting more and more expressive with her inflections (on things like OKAY! and 'owwwww!' and we find it hilarious.)
She also makes sounds for dog, cat, giraffe, lion, cow, sheep, monkey, duck, elephant, horse, snake, owl, and firetruck (I have a video of her doing many of these words and sounds that I'll have to try to put together...sometime 😅).
Words can't even express how much we love this girl!
_ _ _
han.
We're getting down to the last few weeks of this pregnancy (due date is only three weeks away!) and I still can't believe just how different two pregnancies can be. This pregnancy has been better in literally every aspect than my previous pregnancy with Lydia, but just like last time there have been some truly bizarre pregnancy quirks that I was not expecting!
Cravings are real. While pregnant with Lydia I would constantly be cycling through food ideas until I finally settled on something that didn't make me feel sick, so food aversions were much more prevalent than actual cravings. This time I've just wanted ALL THE ONION RINGS and ALL THE BAKED GOODS! haha (This was especially true toward the end of the first trimester/beginning of the second, and has thankfully calmed down..at least a little.)
HICCUPS. ALL. DAY. ....But not mine, THE BABY'S! This little boy gets the hiccups 4 times a day - minimum! Overall, I would say he is much less active than Lydia was (hoping this will translate to once he is out of the womb as well ;)) but the hiccups are no joke! They are STRONG! (I kid you not, AS I AM TYPING THIS, he just got the hiccups. Can't say I'm surprised.)
Constant need of breath mints. Whenever I eat something that is really sweet (especially store-bought things like Honey Nut Cheerios and granola bars) it leaves the WORST taste in my mouth. I've tried rinsing my mouth out, but the only thing that really works is brushing my teeth or getting a mint. (One might think that this would keep me from eating so many sweets...I'll go ahead and let them think that ;))
Belly-button halfway popped out. If you remember (which I don't know why you would haha) I was fully expecting my belly button to pop out last time and it never did! This time it hasn't completely popped out, but the top-half has?! hahaha idk it's weird.
Hyper-sensitive smell. I've heard about this before, but WOAH. The last couple weeks especially have been CRAAZZZZY. It's actually been a huge blessing that I've had a little bit of a cold because if my nose wasn't stuffy, the cleaning product that was used in the hallways of our apartment complex might have knocked me right out. 😳
Loud breathing. My normal breathing is SO LOUD!...The worst part is, I honestly had no clue until one day when I was rewatching an insta-story and was trying to figure out what the "bear sound" was 😂🙈! hahahha. I asked Stephen about it and he was like "Oh yeah! Your breathing is really loud." 😑🙈 ...At least it's better than the bear-like snoring that I was experiencing last time?! (Also, I try to hold my breath during all of my insta-stories now 😂😂)
Main differences between pregnancies 1 & 2:
It's actually possible for "morning sickness" to only be in the morning, and can actually go away completely after the first trimester. This fact basically blew my mind. With Lydia the naseau was pretty much constant from the time I woke up to the time I went to bed, and I often woke up in the middle of the night still feeling nauseous from about weeks 8-30. Needless to say, I'm thrilled to say that that was NOT the case this time!
Wearing my wedding ring. With Lydia, my fingers were so swollen that by about week 20 I had to put my wedding ring in a special box and find another ring to wear for the second half of the pregnancy. Now I'm 37 weeks in and my ring is still going strong! (This probably has a lot to do with the fact that I was pregnant with Lydia through the summer, where as this time it has primarily been fall/winter/spring.)
Fitting in non-maternity pants. I'm quite a bit smaller this time around than I was last time (due to many reasons, but the main one being the fact that I haven't been nauseous every day which has done wonders for my overall health) so some of the maternity clothes (mostly pants) I bought when I was pregnant with Lydia are still too big! I'm currently wearing THESE non-maternity pants (with a stretchy waist) 5 days a week and I LOVE THEM. I'm also thinking I probably should have purchased a second and third pair at some point...
Emotional. I didn't include this one in the section above because I'm pretty sure everyone expects to be more emotional when they're pregnant, but this time I have definitely felt it in very different ways than I did during my pregnancy with Lydia. This pregnancy I'm much more likely to cry over silly things (like proposal videos of complete strangers on youtube) and I'm also a lot more sensitive and anxious! I've had to stop taking Lydia to the park the last couple weeks because my anxiety was through the roof! (Although, to be fair, I'm not sure how much that has to do with being pregnant or the fact that Lydia has no fear at the park these days...😬.)
I'm truly curious to know if this pregnancy has been so different simply because every pregnancy is different or if because it's a boy instead of a girl?! I guess only time will tell!
-Hannah
PS TIP: If you are someone who gets sick often during pregnancy (🤢), get some of THESE BAGS. They are approx. 1000x better than throwing up in a toilet.
